Being your fabulous self & rocking it.

I think there’s been quite a bit of confusion regarding self-esteem (and women’s self-esteem in particular). As someone working to empower both herself and others, it can be challenging to balance love for your physical self and love for your inner-self. As women in this society we are taught from an early age to be pretty little things- we are told we are by nature something of great physical beauty, pretty aesthetic, and we must forever strive to be youthful and beautiful. On the other hand, I’ve noticed a decent portion of Third Wave Feminists insisting that any focus- no matter how small or rare- dedicated to admiring and accepting one’s appearance is purely selfish vanity and something to be avoided entirely. That we as women have so long faced the beauty standards imposed upon us, demanding we fit the attractive ideal of our societies; that we should be ashamed of ourselves for even regarding ourselves as “pretty” because being “pretty” is such a shallow concept.

As someone trying hard every day to love herself and teach others to love themselves, it’s hard for me to strike the perfect balance between these two conflicting theories. I don’t take what I do lightly. How dare I insinuate that you are beloved partially because you’re conventionally attractive? But I believe it’s just as important to question how I dare demand you not find your physique beautiful.

Newsflash~ It is 100% okay and acceptable and even GOOD to like how you look.

Let me repeat that.

IT IS GOOD AND OKAY TO THINK THAT YOU ARE ATTRACTIVE ON THE OUTSIDE. IT IS OKAY TO BELIEVE YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AND GORGEOUS AND ROCKING THAT NICE ASS.

There is nothing wrong with loving your physical self. You are not vain, or shallow, or doing a disservice to women everywhere- you are being a badass bitch full of love, compassion, and confidence. Fuck anyone who says otherwise.

And while we’re speaking of screwing anyone trying to restrict you, You are NOT your body.

You are not limited to outer-beauty. You are a tangle of beautiful characteristics and inner-qualities and your beauty cannot and will not ever be measured by your weight, shape, height, skin tone, the color of your eyes, the waves/kink/straightness of your hair! You are not just a pretty thing.

You are NOT just a pretty thing.

You are so, so much more than that.

So while loving your appearance is very vital to your self-love journey, remember that you are also a stunning creature on the inside. Your every pore seeps beauty. However, you are also beautiful because of the way you snort when you laugh, and that quirky thing you do with your hands while speaking, and the love and empathy you show for other beings.

Your beauty is unlimited. So should your self-love be.

Sparking self-esteem within your children/siblings.

Hey ya’ll. Happy Tuesday! I can’t believe we’re already this far into August. Since a lot of kiddies shall be returning back to school very soon, now is the perfect time to catch up with them and make sure they’re developing a nice, steady foundation of self-confidence. Here are a few crafts or projects you can do with your child or younger sibling to help reinforce the idea that they are important, worthy, beautiful, and strong. The main message behind these projects is: Not only do YOU matter, but what you think about yourself matters too; your own perception of yourself is arguably the most powerful belief and is definitely more important than what other people think of you. I think it’s a great thing for kids to learn. Too often we start these journeys to self-acceptance so late in life. Give your loved one a head start. ♡

I AM BOARD

Grab a large piece of paper, a canvas, or any sort of similar material. For this craft we will be focusing on what we think of ourselves and what we think our strengths/positive qualities are. It’s vital to do this so that we recognize the good within ourselves and to remind us that we have things that we are not only already good at but can work on to become even more amazing than we already are. Grab some scissors, markers/crayons/pens/paints, a form of glue/tape, pretty little trinkets to adorn your craft, and any sort of patterned paper you enjoy (for an older child, you could incorporate magazine clippings). Using whatever writing utensil you’d like, draw in large letters “I AM…” and then go nuts. Fill in the space remaining with various characteristics you admire about yourself (i.e: strong, independent, talented at ___, good at ____) and decorate the heck out of it. For bonus points, include a picture of yourself- preferably a picture in which you felt most beautiful or happy.

PRETTY PETALS

For this craft you will need two different colored cardstock/papers, glue/tape, marker, something round you can trace (size depends on how big you want the flower to be), scissors, and a pencil. The main goal of this project is very similar to the one above; we will be naming characteristics/qualities of ourselves that we think are good or great, but these will mostly be one-word descriptions (ex.: truthful, artistic, kind, hardworking, etc.). Trace a circle on the piece of paper you would like to be the inner part of the flower. Cut the shape out and write your name on it with your favorite color marker. Feel free to decorate it as you please. Then, using your other piece of paper, draw petal shapes and cut these out too. The amount of petals is entirely up to you. Then write one nice thing about yourself on each petal- remember, you can decorate these too if you want! Then using the glue/tape, connect the petals to the center piece and voila! Your self-esteem flower is complete!

MYSELF & I

This last project is all about positivity. Unlike the two I have already mentioned, this particular craft involves both your own self-perception and how others view you. You will need either a canvas or a large piece of paper, a pen/marker, and some paints (watercolor will work best). Take your pen or marker and draw the silhouette of a person from the shoulders up. Next, take the paints and have fun. Decorate the two defined spaces of the paper as it pleases you. Personally, I made mine teal and green/blue on the outside and blue/purple on the inside of the silhouette. Wait for this to dry. When it’s safe to play with again, use your pen/marker and write the best compliments you have ever received on the outside of the silhouette. These may include compliments regarding physical appearance/beauty, but it’s important to really keep your mind on the great things of yourself that cannot be “seen”. After all, one’s true beauty cannot be measured by how fabulous you look on the outside! When you’ve completed that, take your time and write within the silhouette the characteristics you personally admire about yourself/love about you. When that is finished, adorn as you wish and feel proud that you’ve done this project.

Thanks to Pinterest for inspiring these projects. Have you tried/will you be trying any of these with your little ones? What were the results?

50 Ways To Cheer Up Your Inner-Grump

It’s okay to be grumpy sometimes. Shitty things happen and occasionally we don’t even need unfortunate circumstances in order to feel under the weather. And while it’s totally A-Okay to not feel good all the time, it truly does help to be able to cheer yourself back up. Whether it’s enough to get you on your A-game or simply make you less likely to hurt yourself and do something you will regret later on, it’s all good! Any step in the right direction is a great thing. Here is a list I’ve compiled of 50 techniques I’ve used in the past that have succeeded in raising my spirits. I promise they’re all positive, healthy ideas. (:

1. Give somebody a hug. 2. Bake something yummy. 3. Cuddle with a furry friend. 4. Read a good book. 5. Take a warm shower or a bubble bath. 6. Watch one of your favorite movies. 7. Play Uno with your family/friends (or your favorite game). 8. Volunteer your time for a good cause. 9. Clean the house/your room. 10. Gulp down a glass of water. 11. Take a walk outside. 12. Visit with friends and loved ones. 13. Wear super comfy clothes. 14. Write down all of the things you’re grateful for today. 15. Get crafty and create something. 16. Light a candle in your favorite scent. 17. Wear your favorite perfume. 18. Pamper yourself~ Use a face/body scrub, face mask, hair mask, body butter, etc. 19. Compliment a stranger. 20. Compliment yourself. 21. Exercise and get that heart rate up. 22. Have a delicious snack. 23. Paint your nails in your favorite color. 24. Go on an adventure. 25. Cheer someone else up. 26. Listen to music that makes you happy. 27. Smile. 28. Dress up in the outfit that makes you feel like you can conquer the world. 29. Get out of the house. 30. Cook a beloved meal. 31. Draw something. 32. Watch silly videos. 33. Grab your favorite Starbucks drink. 34. Buy yourself some flowers to brighten up your room. 35. Laugh as much as you can. 36. Have a good cry. 37. Take a nap. 38. Call up a friend. 39. Daydream about happy things. 40. Eat something that’s good for you. 41. Draw flowers/shapes on your arms. 42. Enjoy a cup of tea. 43. Pay fun Interwebs games. 44. Relax on something comfortable. 45. Try a different makeup look or hairstyle. 46. Blow bubbles. 47. Tell a stupid joke. 48. Go exploring the town. 49. Write in a journal. 50. Try something new.

One Hundred Things.

Happy Monday, everybody! It’s been a gorgeous couple days now. The grass is wet from rain, the sun is shining upon the face of the world, and this summer breeze is divine. Seems like a recipe for a peaceful day, eh?

To help add to this bright and lovely day, let’s get some gratitude up in this bitch. ;D This is as much an exercise for me as it is for you- I DARE you to whip out your Radical Self Love Bible/Art Journal/Diary and write down one-freaking-hundred things you are thankful for. Said things can be: people, memories, places, objects, creatures, feelings, etc. Hell, write it down using your favorite color pen! Doodle the heck out of these pages, man!

(TL;DR: Go H.A.M on this, por favor.)

Just for convenience’s sake- and the fact that I’m in the mood to type up a storm- I shall put my list right here. Maybe it will spark some ideas in you, who knows? What are the top five things you are grateful for today?

1. My laptop 2. My Mermie 3. My family 4. Fat cats 5. Chubby puppies 6. My friends 7. The rest of my loved ones 8. Silly straws 9. The Interwebs! 10. Green tea ice cream 11. My home 12. My crystal necklaces 13. This number (It’s my lucky one c: ) 14. Netflix 15. My phone 16. My bb Loaches 17. Summer days like this 18. Summer in general 19. Finding a journal that feels oh-so-right and that you can’t wait to write in 20. The fact that MICHAELS CRAFT STORE SELLS FUCKING GRUMPY CAT PLUSHIES eeeeeep 21. New videos from my favorite Youtubers 22. Trying new foods/adventures 23. The satisfaction one receives when cleaning their ears with Q-tips 24. Comfy/soft headbands 25. Having the house stocked with enough (and healthy, woo!) food 26. Crafting with my mom 27. The last weekend I hung out with my niece. She’s damn precious 28. Distancing myself from negative people and situations 29. Finding a new face wash that seems to be very promising 30. A warm cup of tea in the morning 31. Kittens that cuddle 32. Giant bath tubs that can fit more than one person and are more of a Jacuzzi than anything 33. Smiling! 34. Finding new body-positive pins on Pinterest 35. Fresh Peaches from the Farmer’s Market 36. French Macaroons that melt in your mouth 37. Waking up to C’s dog attacking me with love and smooches 38. Cuddles 39. Spending time with my Merm 40. Kettle corn 41. Catchy and positive songs 42. Having great concerts to look forward to 43. My purple/pink Cone-flowers being soooo in bloom 44. Knowing I’m almost halfway done with this list 😉 45. Actually-funny vines 46. Warm showers 47. Being brave enough to squash that monstrous bug in C’s bathroom that was trying to kill us 48. Fuzzy socks 49. Finding a new food that tastes yummy- bonus points if it’s healthy too 50. My new Happiness Jar (Will D.I.Y it up in next post) 51. When your hair feels hella soft right after you deep condition it 52. Purple hair 53. Candles 54. Tiny LED flashlights 55. Not having to wake up to an alarm 56. Knowing I don’t start school until super late August 😀 57. Online games 58. Accomplishing the stressful tasks on my daily To Do List 59. Kind strangers 60. Homemade Lemon Bars 61. Moments of utter silliness 62. Feeling in the mood to write again 63. A large, chilled glass of water 64. Feeling more relieved after days of relatively high Anxiety 65. Working on bad habits 66. Ridiculously comfortable and soft sleepy-time clothes 67. Petting furry animals 68. Seeing C’s mysterious third cat, Bubbles 69. Creepy kids’ movies/T.V shows 70. Peeing when you’ve been waiting forever to use the bathroom 71. Sleepovers that go well 72. Facing my fears 73. All that I have accomplished in my life so far 74. Glitter 75. Pretty nail polish 76. Super cozy beds 77. Disney movies 78. The extremely soft and wonderful couches in my basement 79. When I keep my room clean 80. Having the house to myself 81. Receiving genuine compliments 82. Modern medicine 83. My health insurance plan 84. My good health 85. My body 86. My soul and spirit 87. My determination to push through hard times 88.Positive thinking/thoughts 89. Decorating my room 90. Visiting the beach for the first time in years 91. A fully charged battery 92. A working freezer and refrigerator 93. Dancing 94. Seeing my loved ones being happy 95. That I’m alive 96. Having safe access to water and electricity 97. Snuggling a freshly dried blanket or comforter on a chilly day 98. Times of relaxations and rest 99. New episodes of Adventure Time 100. Happy dreams. ❤

Another Pep Talk From Violet

Dear Reader,

I made this special note just for you. Yes, you! View it as an ode to your marvelousness and a reminder that no matter how hard your current battles are, or how long you’ve been fighting, it is all worth it in the end. Adversity has the power to contribute to a person’s greatness. Let your problems add to your principle and remember your obstacles are not brick walls- they are just challenges. Do not be afraid to fail and keep that head held high. You were made for victory. You are destined to achieve your goals and dreams; you are fated for a happen ending that is so worth all the hard work you have and will put into it. Learn all that you can, and count your blessing before bedtime.

I don’t just hope that you will gain what you need most, I know that you will gain what you need most.

Keep fighting the good fight.

♥, Violet

Spreading some love ♥

Good afternoon, Interwebs! How is everyone’s day so far? It’s very bright and sunny out where I am- there are flowers peeping out from everywhere! Although I’m personally partial to gloom and rain, I have to admit that seeing the grass look like little blades of emerald is magical to see.

And what else is magical?

YOU.

Yes, you.

Your words. Your thoughts & actions & quirks & laughter.

Everything you are and do is powerful, and influences your entire life and all it touches.

So today, use your power for good. Love yourself, love others, and let your kindness touch all corners of the earth! I feel good about myself today, and I want you to, too. So do something to pamper yourself and help someone else out. It can honestly change everything.

What would you do if you truly believed in yourself and your ability to transform things? Would you act any differently than you do now?